Cra-Zee

Anyone who’s ever had to tolerate my raves knows how crazy I can get about the Bombay film industry: actors, actresses, lyricists, directors, art directors, composers, cameramen, make-up artists, I know all about them. Do not ask me which part of my brain stores such trivia. It seems there’s room enough.

So imagine my awe when my very generous uncle offered me a ticket to the Zee Cine Awards which took place in Mauritius yesterday: Shah Rukh Khan, Preity Zinta, Rani Mukherji, all that! Despite the Class 2 cyclone warning prevailing, we joyously braved the winds and umbrella-ed our way through the rain to reach the venue.


It was odd.

Seated celebrities were separated from the rest of the audience (platinum-tickets notwithstanding) by metal chest-level barriers, which gave the very weird feeling to a number of ministers sitting with us that they were suddenly very out. Ladies who had actually shelled out the whopping Rs10,000 for the tickets still had to get soaked in their sarees (compelled by their non-celebrity status to park far from the conference centre), looking like Bollywood actresses in a dhak-dhak number long before the heroines climbed on stage.

The dreamt-up sequence of Abhishek jumping to Dus Bahane was never to materialise, Mr Bachchan having come down with the flu and decided not to come to Mauritius (probably shying away from chikungunya too).

The joke was on from the moment they all kept insisting the show was being broadcast live worldwide (Karan really digging that one in) when in fact it wasn’t. Black took all the awards and so most of the other actors were disillusioned before the show began. (It gets tiring of being asked “who do you think will win?” when everyone already knows).

Still it was thrilling to watch SRK pick up Preity for a remake of Veer-Zaara, to see Rani looking charming in her white and silver saree, and listen to two young singers belt out last year’s hits.

All in all, I’m really glad I got the chance to be there, which I would not have done had someone not thought of me. I’m happier having seen it and clearly remembering how very starkly we should draw the line between reality and show than I would have been fantasising about what it must be to attend such a show. Watching it on TV from home later was fun, because when every wrinkle had been edited out and you actually got to see the stars’ faces, it was a good show.

The “janta” of Mauritius was certainly lucky to welcome the Zee Cine Awards, if only it brings along the hordes of tourists we are now expecting from all around the world.